“We do not like growing up in a world with war because it is stupid, and even the ones who ‘win’ end up suffering.” This powerful statement, more blunt and clear than any I have heard in meetings with national leaders, came from an even more authoritative source: children who had survived conflicts, poverty, deprivation and even the criminal hands of human traffickers.

The words were part of a poem the children conveyed to me at the Community of Sant’Egidio’s Tenda di Abramo centre in Rome, one of several refugee sites I have visited in recent weeks across Europe to show solidarity, building on many past meetings with families living in camps in Lebanon, Jordan, Turkey and other host countries.

The families have lost their homes, but I feel at home among them. Sitting with a small group of people from the Middle East, Africa and beyond, I was listening intently when a young boy caught my eye. “How old are you?” I asked. “Six,” he replied proudly.

I recalled how when I was that age, I was forced to flee my own home during the Korean War. Although I never had to travel as far as they did, and was spared many of the ordeals that have left them scarred, I knew all too well the confusion and fear of abandoning my village as bombs fell.

I will never forget watching my grandfather frantically search for something to feed us on the mountainside where we hid. I was too young to understand terms such as ‘collective security’ but when I saw the multinational troops serving under the United Nations flag, I knew we were not alone. And when the UN provided us with life-saving supplies, I felt the beginnings of responsibility to give back to the world that had saved me.

I am not special. Those I have met at the Tenda di Abramo in Italy, the Gabcíkovo Humanitarian Centre in Slovakia, and the Welcome and Integration Centre for Migrants in Spain are all eager to contribute to society. People like Alou Sanogo Badara, a 22-year old student from Mali. He fled the conflict in his country, walked through 3,000 kilometres of desert and mourned friends who died along the way. More lives were lost on the small boat that carried him, along with nearly 100 others, across the Mediterranean. Now across a cultural divide in Italy he says: “Here, I have found love and friendship.”

A mother of two from Afghanistan, Sediqa Rahimi, said she considers herself an “agent of peace.” Watching her own sons play happily, she said, recalled the trauma of home. “How many children in Afghanistan wake up to the sound of gunfire and bombs?” This is the terrifying reality for millions of Syrians who have suffered far too long from a war which the parties and countries with influence must urgently work to end.

Like millions of Europeans and others who pieced back together shattered lives following the end of the Second World War, today’s arrivals want what all people want: safety, stability and a better future for their loved ones.

I am deeply concerned about those who exploit their suffering by stoking xenophobia and spewing hate speech. These actions divide communities, sow instability and betray the values and human rights standards that underpin the European Union. I call on European and other leaders – and the world – to come together in a collective response reflecting these values and respecting the dignity of people fleeing conflict and poverty.

The sealing of borders, criminalization and detention regimes will not resolve any problems. Instead, countries should provide more safe and legal avenues for migrants and refugees to enter, more resettlement opportunities, better local integration options and greater investments in chronically underfunded relief operations. With creative thinking, we can generate opportunities for more migrants and refugees, for example through private sector scholarships, humanitarian visas and diaspora sponsors.

This compassionate response is also an effective way to combat smuggling and trafficking networks that thrive on desperate people.

The current policies are clearly not adequate. It is time for the international community to develop a global response to mass population flows. I am working to bring countries together behind more a humane and coordinated approach. Progress would serve the common interest of all nations.

The children I met at the Tenda di Abramo centre in Rome sang of how they had travelled from different continents, concluding their performance with a message for the world: “But what difference does it make? We are all humanity.”